Being a "Gentleman" = Being sexist?

Discussion in 'Debate' started by Imperial, Jul 30, 2016.

  1. Imperial

    Imperial Registered User Member

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  2. Imperial
  3. This is being posted in debate only because it might turn into one

    "Being a gentleman" = to being sexist. I make this point because it suggests that men should obey our gender roles which in itself is sexist but it also by mere implication means that women should obey theirs as well and "know their place" or be in the kitchen yada yada you know how it is. Furthermore even the actions that are considered gentlemanly have their roots in sexism which is hardly surprising considering the time period they came from.

    Take for example standing on the outside of the footpath. I've heard this "justified" by saying well women are weaker... Okay physically on average yes that's true but no man is going to stop a car so the logic of protection on a strength basis is absurd and you're constructing this scenario where the woman is more important than the man or he should be at more risk simply for being a man because she's "weaker" or needs special protection simply because she's a woman... How is that not sexist? How is it not sexist that someone should have their car door opened for them or their seat pulled out because they're a woman? How is that not infantilizing because that's what we do for children being its "harder" for them to do because they're small and weak.

    The more I think about it the more I've come to realize how sexist all this shit is.
     
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  4. bud

    bud yikes :( BoonForums Manager

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  6. It isn't really sexist, though, it's always been in our nature to give our females the protection they need. We baby our females because they are what brings life into this world honestly, yeah guys provide the small element to making life, but who doesn't want to protect the people that carry our children? I simply would want to, regardless of the age, old or young. It's just in our nature to do so.

    If I saw a male getting yelled / hit by a female I would simply walk away because the male knows better than to hit a lady and to disrespect her in front of people, I would have thought the guy deserved it, he should know better. I don't think a female would just embarrass herself and yell at her lover for no reason. But if I saw a lady gets yelled and beat, I would definitely jump in because regardless of what she did, she's still a lady, the same gender your mother is, the same gender of the person who carried you for 9 months and gave birth to your big ass through a small ass hole. So if you think that it's sexist to protect the ladies in your life then you really need to keep thinking of the things that women go through in their lifetime, they deserve protection.

    Just saying.
     
  7. Imperial

    Imperial Registered User Member

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  9. So you treat women like babies & you would walk away from domestic abuse because its a woman hitting a man because women can get pregnant? what? lol
     
  10. bud

    bud yikes :( BoonForums Manager

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  12. You're literally just throwing words in my mouth, did you not read what i just said? Lol... If a MAN is stupid enough to stay in a domestic relationship then he deserves it lol.. Men know when to walk away, boys don't.

    I would protect women they deserve it lol they dont have it easy in life and if you think they do then literally get out. i want you to read articles on how women are treated WAY differently than men do. Men have it easy, youre such a typical boy.
     
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  13. Imperial

    Imperial Registered User Member

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  15. A man deserves to be abused because he stays in a relationship? Oh dear. Men have it easy? How so?

    Also you said "We baby our females because they are what brings life into this world"
    "If I saw a woman hitting a man I would walk away"

    I didn't put anything in your mouth
     
  16. bud

    bud yikes :( BoonForums Manager

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  18. If I saw a women hitting a man I would think he deserved it. My girlfriend doesn't hit me for no reason, whenever I say something that comes close to disrespecting her she slaps me, that shit doesn't hurt... If a man is getting abused constantly, getting beat by a women then he deserves it. He should have known when to walk away, same for women but women are stubborn and emotional and sensitive. That's the main difference, our fathers teach us to be men. To respect women and elders mostly. Do our fathers raise our women to be men? No. Our mothers raise them to be ladies and to have self respect. If someone doesn't have a father or a mother then whoever raising them should teach them. I was taught to respect and protect women. Not to protect men, I'd respect men but not protect them. They should protect themselves.
     
  19. Imperial

    Imperial Registered User Member

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  21. So a man who has been domestically abused deserves it if he stays in the relationship? Do you have the same view about women who stay?
    So you'd step in to help a woman but not a man?
    You've got some massive double standards there
     
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  24. It isn't double standards, though, you aren't getting what I'm trying to say. Yeah, the man who stayed in a domestically abused relationship is stupid and deserves it because he didn't WALK AWAY. If you let yourself get abused for a long period of time by a woman who is most likely weaker than you, then they aren't men. You wouldn't let love get in the way of you doing something stupid like stay in a relationship of domestic abuse. Women get abused to staying, women get raped and stalked, they get scared more than men do. A man can push the women out of the way, the man can literally file a restraining order, some women are too afraid too. Please read domestic abuse articles and please look at the difference of each gender. Men have a choice sometimes, women don't. They are smaller than us, weaker than us, they have a gift that we don't so that makes them more valuable to me. This is my opinion on how i look at things, I will always protect women more than I will protect men, double standards idc lol... equality with both genders will never be a thing. this isn't sexism
     
  25. Imperial

    Imperial Registered User Member

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  27. "If you let yourself get abused for a long period of time by a woman who is most likely weaker than you, then they aren't men"

    Is the same true on the vice versa?

    "women get raped and stalked"

    You know women can rape and stalk men too right?
     
  28. bud

    bud yikes :( BoonForums Manager

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  30. if you let yourself get stalked by a woman and not do anything about it then you aren't a man because he's just letting it happen, men will report shit, women are too afraid too if you don't get what I'm trying to say. I know rape is a thing with men too, but boys are boys whod rather admit to having sex with the person rather admitting that they got raped. Women are scarred for life literally, they'd cry themselves to sleep, some men are scared, but not as often are women are... Watch a rape episode of law and order svu or just watch a season of that show. It'll just change how you look at things, some of the cases on that show are based on a real story.

    An episode of that show: (based on a real story, watching this episode made me sick)

    A girl wanted to pay for college so she makes porn, 2 college boys see it, they invite her to a party and rape her, she didn't want to report it but her dorm supervisor or whatever reports it for her. She had marks on her body, she was too afraid to report them because of what they might do if her case doesn't get justified. They taped her getting raped, saying no, they taped her crying and when that video was shown to the judge and the jury, it shows she was saying no. Guess what the "men" said? They thought she wanted it because it was one of her fantasies in her past videos. The boys aren't sent to jail and the case was closed, they set the boys off with no charge whatsoever and she thought since she literally embarrassed herself to report what happened to her, she became a pornstar full time and dropped out of college because of a couple of boys... The girl was so young.. under the age of 22.

    Do boys get tracked down irl and raped because of their posts on the internet? No lol... they really don't, but women do, in colleges, work, libraries. It happens dude, and reality sucks.
    --- Double Post Merged, Jul 30, 2016 ---
    And to add to the episode, she was so scared that she DROPPED OUT. Men usually get over it and say they had sex with the female rather than being "forced or raped" it's honestly true. Its reality, this is reality.
     
  31. Imperial

    Imperial Registered User Member

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  33. "men will report shit, women are too afraid too"
    Men report assaults especially sexually assaults a lot less than women do even when ratio is accounted for. The CDC rape reports are almost equal yet the cases of reports aren't even close.

    "Do boys get tracked down irl and raped because of their posts on the internet? No"
    No, women face more stalking and sexual harassment but only by a margin of 3%
    PI_2014.10.22__online-harassment-03.png
     
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  34. bud

    bud yikes :( BoonForums Manager

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  36. Good debate
     
  37. Pad

    Pad ginger snap -hacked by amelia- Member

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  39. equality, thats all im saying to this really lol.
     
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  40. Kaelyn

    Kaelyn Registered User Member

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  42. Men who are raped don't report it because who's going to believe someone weaker and smaller than them raped him? No one. It's doubled standards. People say "men can get raped too", but when it happens, no one believes them. Most men just choose to play it off and say it was consensual. -- Plus no one cares how much sex a man has.

    If a girl hits a man and the man hits back, he's the one who gets in trouble. All these girls believe in equal rights and feminism, but when a man defends himself, he's the one who's in the wrong? If a girl is willing to hit like a man then she can take it like a man. Personally, if i'm stepping out of line please hit me. Wake me up and knock some sense into me. Male or female, I don't care. Girls think just because we are the ones who gives birth and are caregivers we should have special rights, but really they just want to be superior to men which will never happen.
     
  43. bud

    bud yikes :( BoonForums Manager

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  45. I honestly believe if a women hits a man then they should just take it or walk away.... If the women is build and bulked up then be my guest but if she hit you and it didnt hurt or make you bleed then walk away and dont start shit
     
  46. Kaelyn

    Kaelyn Registered User Member

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  47. saveyoursouls.
  48. The problem with that is then she's gonna think it's okay for her to hit a man anytime she wants. If anyone hits anyone, they have the right to protect theirself, self defense. Doesn't matter the gender. If a woman is big and bad enough to hit a man, then she should take it like a man if he hits back. Especially if she's a feminist. They want equal rights. Equal rights doesn't mean the girl gets away with hitting a man first, but the man gets in trouble for it.
     
  49. Pad

    Pad ginger snap -hacked by amelia- Member

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  51. as someone who was domestically abused by a female partner for almost 3 years, it really doesnt work like that at all in any way, shape or form. i wish it was that simple but no, those scars will never heal.
     
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  52. bud

    bud yikes :( BoonForums Manager

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  54. idk i have different opinions i guess :(
     
  55. Nerd

    Nerd Ass Queen Senior Forum Staff

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  57. You're allowed to have different opinions. I just don't think you should word/say things like, "If a man stays in an abusive relationship he doesn't deserve to be called a man." It doesn't entirely work that way. However, I also have a mom who is a nurse and primarily works in an ER. She's developed a program from sexual assault/domestic abuse. Not everyone has the opportunity to be educated the same way, nor have they been raised to have similar opinions. Things like this give you the opportunity to gather a little more information than you currently have.
     
  58. Mistress

    Mistress murdered everybody Member

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  61. insanium
  62. im sorry but the "if a woman hits a man, he should hit her back" no no no. don't ever wanna read something like this again. Men are physically built to be stronger than women, if I punch a man and he punches me back that in itself is not even proportionally painful for either of us. I get it, women are feisty and tend to lash out but that gives no man the right to get mad and slap a women across the face because of something said. Self-control is something needed on both sides of the spectrum. Being a gentlemen is not sexist, its something taught to all boys as they grow up. Its a way to teach them to respect a woman similar to how one would respect his mother/grandmother/etc. You holding the door open for me doesn't make you sexist, it makes you a kind human being. I'm not going to curse you out because holding a door open for me is symbolic to me being too weak to hold it open for myself. Shit I just might be if its a heavy ass door, yeah hold it open for me thank you. That's how I was taught. And about the whole domestic violence thing, abuse comes in all shapes and sizes and thats all I'm going to say about it.
     
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